Genaidaliz Claudio is a columnist for BardVERSE. Her columns appear weekly.

 

It’s 11:52 p.m.

I’m sitting on my floor covered in chocolate syrup, contemplating my life.

I really don’t know what I’m doing with my life at the moment. I hate how sad I’ve become. I’ve lost my motivation. I used to be considered the “funny,” “positive” person.

I miss that Gini.

I’ve been so caught up with school and work. I’m grateful for everyone and everything I have in my life, but I want a change. I want a new look, a new life. I’m always doing the same thing every day, and it saddens me. I want to know when I’m going to stop hating myself and see the beauty, power, and radiance everyone else sees in me.

I doubt this entry will be published because there’s no “good message.”

But there is a message. Life is hard, people can be difficult. Don’t let people and their life negatively affect how you live. I should take my own advice, but I know life isn’t all rainbows and butterflies. Things get hard, reality is tough, and finding yourself through every obstacle life throws at you is the hardest.

Chocolate syrup should be sweet. But it’s messy.